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Rupert Goodwins

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Mixed Signals

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Thursday 18 June 2009, 3:37 PM

Apple 3G S fetishists - your number is up

Posted by Rupert Goodwins

With the release of Apple iPhone OS 3.0, a widespread affliction has become a true, World Health Organisation recognised pandemic. I speak, of course, of the almost eroticised fetishisation that many iPhone owners have for their hardware: it is not too far away from paraphilia when they stroke, coo, gaze lovingly upon and even talk to their devices (and no, not during voice telephony).

Many of my nearest and dearest have fallen foul of this unpleasant affliction. But to get it accepted as a proper condition - and thus start the long, difficult process of finding and applying a cure - it needs a name.

But what to name it? Where could I find a suitable concentration of deeply disturbed yet intelligent people, who would understand what I was saying only too well?

Twitter, of course (where I'm @rupertg) . So I asked for suggestions...

You're a creative lot! Here's the current crop:

* iPhreaks @shadowfax1804
* Massive Losers @katiesol
* Begins with W, ends with kers - @FrasSmith
* Autoerotic technophilia @fgalv
* iPhurries @nickhide
* iSpods @liquidindian
* iPhonlies @Vibrosies
* Multi-touched @mikejaydavies
* iParaphilia @sebFlyte
* Maybe it starts with "lo" and ends with "sers". iPhonitism is quite strange, even for a fetish... @jackschofield
* The word for such users is 'Hello' @WGallagher

Me, I go for malaphilia, from mala, which is latin for apple, also malus which is latin for evil (although @RobBuckley says that it should be milophilia to be true to the Greek, you don't get that nice Apple=Evil effect).

Any more?

Comments on this post

Joffy

Great list. Particularly like your Latin suggestion though I don't think all Apple's endeavours are quite so worth of their own fetish. Perhaps I could suggest Egophonolagnia.

Posted by Joffy on Jun 18, 2009 4:29 PM

1000238123

iJob

Posted by 1000238123 on Jun 18, 2009 11:48 PM

John Molloy

Typical response from jack schofield. Still a big Windows Mobile fan I suspect.

Posted by John Molloy on Jun 19, 2009 3:18 AM

mtlevy

iMuppet

Posted by mtlevy on Jun 19, 2009 9:07 AM

Charles McLellan

iNeedtogetoutmore

Posted by Charles McLellan on Jun 19, 2009 12:06 PM

mtlevy

can't believe I didn't think of this one earlier...

iDiots.

Posted by mtlevy on Jun 19, 2009 12:13 PM

mtlevy

This comment has been deleted at the users request

Updated by mtlevy on Jun 19, 2009 1:28 PM

47894

iPhonitis? (Or would that be just iphonitis?)

Updated by 47894 on Jun 20, 2009 12:01 PM

Rupert Goodwins
  • Rupert Goodwins
  • Location, location, location
  • Member since: October 2006
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