My High Tech Blog

Now's your chance to ask Bill Gates a question via the BBC

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/7161359.stm

I note the item refers to asking Mr Gates himself a question, not Microsoft. Also that the BBC reserves the right to edit and select the best questions. So I expect the question "why does Vista run so slow on my top of the range PC" would probably not be passed on.

A month ago I bought a video camera. The sort that needed a DV cable to connect to your computer. The sales lady wanted me to buy a DV cable. I looked at it through the sealed plastic container. Isn't that a standard firewire cable I ask, I've already got one of those. No a DV cable is different she says. Are you sure, it looks very similar I say. Quite sure, you can always bring it back.

With that reassurance I take my pile of purchases to the cash desk and hand over my credit card, wincing slightly at the price this was costing me.

I get home and find, just as I suspected that my firewire cable does work as a DV cable.

It took me a while to get round to it, but the other day I went back to the shop with still sealed DV cable in hand, complete with receipt as proof of purchase. It so happens I am greeted by the manager. I explain the situation. He is most helpful, "No problem sir, I will give you a refund"

He typed in the number of the receipt into his computer screen, and looks hard at it for a number of seconds. "Hmm" he says, "you haven't been charged for this cable". Sure enough, the DV cable was not on the receipt.

So I have given back a cable I didn't buy, but didn't realise it. I didn't loose anything, but the poor sales lady is now in trouble from the manager for not knowing the difference between a DV and a firewire cable (their isn't one) and for forgetting to charge me for the cable.

Why didn't I just follow my instincts and leave the cable on the hook. We would have all been better off.

First I want to make it absolutely clear, I like Apple. Yes, really I do, I own an iPod. Well it was given to me last Christmas by my wife, but that's not really my point.

Ever since I was prevented from using an original Apple Mackintosh we had at work, because I was too junior and unimportant, I have longed to own one for myself. Unable to afford one, I opted for Acorn. Probably cost me just as much in the long term, but I felt proud I was supporting a UK company. When it finally went to the wall, Apple wasn't cool any more, so I decided that if you can't beat them, join them. So I got a PC, then another, then another, and then another. I'm getting tired of them now. I can probably count in days, the amount of time I have had to wait for the thing to boot up, shit down, and general hanging about.

Hang on, typo, that should be “shut down”.

Err!

perhaps I was right the first time.

I have thought about having a play with Linux, but that is another story, when I get a moment I'll tell it.

Now Apple is cool again, so sometime between now and Christmas, I shall be dusting off the credit card and getting myself a Macbook. Anyway, Mr Apple, what's your name? Jobs is it? You will excuse me if I don't show my excitement in quite the same way that you are used to. I do not whoop! I've seen the videos of your little chats, your “keynote speeches”. Yes “stacks” are good, I like the idea, but not worth getting all excited about, I won't whoop!

I saw the ITN footage taken at the iPhone UK launch, you know the one, the interrupted interview. All the American PR gurus (I assume they were American, their accents fitted), who were getting “really excited” about the iPhone. Then I read about the Apple employees whipping up the crowds in Regent Street, who's idea was that, let me guess, was it one of those American PR people? The iPhone UK launch was like one of those Met Office weather warnings, batten down the hatches people, it's really going to blow, then all we get is a gentle breeze.

Get real guys, its a phone. Yes it looks good, when taken out of the box. Then everyone is going to put their grubby and greasy paws all over the screen and get it really mucky, some might even stick it on the side of their face.

I don't mind you US Apple people doing things your way, when you're at home, but please, we have our own identity, our own ways of doing things, you might laugh at us, but we are a proud lot. Listen to your Apple UK employees. I bet you their ideas will probably work a lot better than yours. In this country at least.

I've already made my feelings known about adverts. Everywhere I look, there they are.

Today I took a journey from Bristol to Slough, a simple trip down the M4. every truck trundling along in the slow lane at a steady 56 mph, had an advert on it. In one case it wasn't even for the owner of the vehicle.

Also in the fields along the motorway, on the side of buildings, all trying to attract my attention, saying here I am, this is my name, remember it.

Now I hear Microsoft, has bought 1.6% of Facebook in order to sell advertising space on the site. Well I'm glad I de-registered from Facebook a number of weeks ago.

I'm sorry, It is an American marketing attitude, to get the message blasted in front of every possible person at every possible opportunity and I don't like it. It turns me off.

I've complained about the animated advert on ZD Net before now, but now I've noticed I'm getting a blast of full screen adverts before being directed to the page I want to read.

Sorry that is too intrusive. Please stop doing it.

Leafing through the current edition of PC Pro magazine last night and came across a rather entertaining article giving 10 regular movie technical myths. You know the ones we all laugh at, like a small laptop is all that is needed to infiltrate and destroy the mothership of invading aliens and that you can drive a BMW by remote control using a mobile phone.

Well I have one other myth for you. Technology makes a noise.

characters zipping onto a screen does so to the sound of little chirrups as each character is displayed. Every flashing LED has a sounder next to it and goes bleep in time with the flashing. A remote camera with very loud zoom motor beams back the signal to the agent in hiding to the sound of morse code.

and my favourite, every button press on any piece of technology, be it a bank ATM or a TV remote control, beeps.